i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
