i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
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