i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
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