I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Randomize
