I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
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