just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
well, you know. whores of a feather.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
Randomize
