i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
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