Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
