Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
Randomize
