Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
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