We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
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