just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
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