Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
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