i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
Randomize
