I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
Randomize
