i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
