Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Randomize
