I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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