I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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