He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
Randomize
