Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
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