My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
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