I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
It was confusing and full of hummus
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
Randomize
