I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize