I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
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