She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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