its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
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