If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize