My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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