I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
All I want is dick and wine.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
