You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
Randomize