his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
Randomize
