I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
