At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Randomize
