Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
Randomize
