using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
