he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
