I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
Ran into my prostitute at Costco yesterday. She was with her boyfriend, I was with my kids. Awwwwkward.
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
