just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Randomize
