I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
so that wasnt chicken after all
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Randomize