Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
Randomize
