is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
Randomize