dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
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