I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
Randomize
