this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
Randomize