He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
You asked the waitress for a vasectomy and handed her a butter knife, like you were ordering something from the menu
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
Randomize
