went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
Farmville is her only friend.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
