one might say we're banned from that church
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
This is my life. Enjoy the view
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Randomize
