He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
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