Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
Randomize
